You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
