Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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