Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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