You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize