So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
