I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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