I hate all girls vehemently.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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