Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
