and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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