I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
