Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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