escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
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