Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
