The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
