Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Randomize
