If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
