Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
