At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
