So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
