well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
