If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I need to stop coming to work sober
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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