About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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