Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
