that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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