Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
