Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
