no, he came in my armpit
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i wish my penis had a tongue
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
