How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
whose ass print is on the piano?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
