I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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