so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize