moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
