I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
