I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
accomplished twins. life is a go
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
