You're so nebulous sometimes
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
