i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
