Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
