You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
