He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
and eventually we just all took our pants off
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
