Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
