i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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