found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize