Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
