What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
