my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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