i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
His nipple licking is glorious
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