Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Randomize
