Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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