haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
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