So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
