i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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