Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow

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(203): View more from Connecticut

hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.

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(678): View more from Georgia

My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.

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(541): View more from Oregon

Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.

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(256): View more from Alabama

i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out

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(312): View more from Illinois

he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it

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