Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
operation harelip BJ is a go
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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